Bix - The Worst Sick Person

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Firstly: Check out NEW BIX PICKS if you haven't already ~> tonomurabix.deviantart.com/jou… FULL OF YUM

But yeah so I've had this sever cold (possibly trying to morph into walking pneumonia) for almost 3 weeks, but I went to the doctor and she's got me full of meds now so I should be on the road to recovery. Should be. I'm a little restless and PMSy right now tho so just ignore me or hear me out... I might regret posting this later hahaha.

I took a half of a sleeping pill, which I'm not 100% sure I should have done, but it's out of desperation to shut my mind UP so I can sleep. I'm starting to feel a little woozy right now, but mind is still babbling. (walls haven't started melting yet though so I'm taking that as a good sign)

My body is absolutely dying and fatigued from this ongoing battle with this cold from hell, and Mother Nature decided to kick me when I'm down so not only am I hacking up mucus and cringing at how my chest/stomach hurts at the effort, but now you can add cramps and bleeding out to that as well.

I get really, really restless when I'm legit sick…. I'm so used to having pains and aches and migraines but still being able to function around them to some degree to be totally out of commission is the pits, and it doesn't take too long before my mind starts to get clogged with so much crap… ideas, deep thoughts, things on my to-do list, silly things I wish could happen that would make me happy, that I start to drive myself even more crazy. Plus since I'm all super hormonal I feel every emotion under the stars in a span of a minute that I give myself whiplash.

I hate hate hate to be one of those people that's like "aw if only I had someone to rely on for help"… but honestly it would be nice occasionally. And especially now when I'm feeling so miserable and frustrated it'd be nice to just have someone pet me on the head and be like "don't worry bro, I got this." I don't want to babied, but for when things look really down, like now, to just have a platonic companion that is there when they can be without any strings or expectations, and all they require is the same from me. It may seem cold and strange to those outside but oh man the feels of gratitude I would have. I'm just like my dogs lol… I just want someone to come rub my head and relax me so I can fall asleep for a while. And hey if they can move the TV for me or run an errand or maybe go grab me some quick groceries too that'd be fantastic.

Alpha is tired of being pack leader all the time, and sometimes wishes for strong second alpha or beta to lean on a little bit. My pack is gone.

† Bix †

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